Clairine

I wasted yet another day…!

Hmm. Let’s take a look at my condition.

1. My final exam is starting this Friday. I haven’t touched, much less looked at the textbook that I’m supposed to read. A lot of pages ok? From page 1 until, like, page 400 or something. Ditto for the other 4 subjects that I am taking. American History! Crap.
2. My university application admission essays. I have to write like, what, 8 or something essays? I haven’t even started yet. Shit.
3. My feet hurt. It’s like I have got some bone-disease. It’s certainly not the muscles that hurt, I’m sure of that. They’ve been hurting for the past 3 or so weeks, and I have yet to see a doctor for it. I’ve no idea what’s wrong with me! It’s an on-off kinda pain.

And what have I been doing for the whole day?

1. Surfing the internet nearly non-stop from 11am to 7pm.
2. Reading the newspaper. Twice.
3. Eating. Sleeping. Eating some more.

I tell you………………….! I’m hopeless.

I’m planning to change blog hosts. I find that I don’t really like friendster blogs. When I upload pictures and they screw it up in the process and the pictures don’t turn up on my blog, they still charge it to my account (as if it’s my fault), and I’m only able to upload 50 pictures a month. What crap! I’m thinking of switching to either blogspot, xanga, or typepad. RIght now, I need to try to do something productive.

UGH!

Please, someone invent a Hardworking Pill and feed it to me.

Modern science has provided cures for sleeplessness, restlessness, siao-ness, stomach ache, head ache, tooth ache, heart ache, leg ache, eye ache, nose ache, what-ache-also-got, and they even have Tongkat Ali for those who want to improve their sex lives (which in my personal opinion is hilariously funny, especially when I see Tongkat Ali booths being swamped by middle-aged men at the pasar malams, it’s like, hello? If your sex life sucks then it sucks la. No amount of Tongkat Ali is gonna help you).

I see no reason why a pill should not be invented to make someone be hardworking.

Alright, I’m being ridiculous. Forgive my stupidity.

As for the story that I posted on my blog about how I incredibly, stupidly, confused diesel with petrol, and for those of you who laugh to yourselves and think "damn, she is stupid!!!" I’d just like to say a few things.

First, everyone should be able to admit the stupid things that they do in life. Second, just because I post it on my blog, doesn’t mean I’m proud of it. Third, even if it is embarrassing for me to admit that I confused such a simple thing (someone told me it is like confusing urine for chrysanthemum tea, like how on earth do you do something like that), at least I am able to laugh it off, pronounce myself stupid-in-that-moment, and treat it as just another day to day experience!

Another thing. Tomorrow I have an American History trial, my side is the defense, and we’re defending George W. Bush on the Iraq War. I’m playing the role of the political analyst. This is just great, you know? Because I know squat about politics and I could hardly care about whether Bush was right or wrong in going into Iraq. I’m supposed to prepare my Q&A paper today, and by now I should have finished it, but so far all I have are about 10 questions with no answers.

And yet another thing. My Business Law quiz (it carries a weightage of 20%, so I think of it as a test) is this Tuesday, and the lecturer is going to cover every single chapter in the syllabus, from contract law to torts, negligence, liability, to third-party contracts, leases, and sales, to breach, nonperformance, claims, and damages…!!! Someone save me. I haven’t started studying yet.

I will drink coffee tonight. I will study. I’ll get all the things that I need to, done. Because this is me. This is what I do. All the time. 11th hour studying. I’m still searching for a cure to this disease.

Gosh, I’m floating!

The AUP Ball, Fall Foliage: Interlude Soiree With Destiny was AMAZING! It was such an incredible night, full of fun and happiness and joy and all that good stuff. From start to end, everything was just PERFECT. I couldn’t have asked for a better night. I didn’t want the night to end! Everything just fell into place, and everything played an equally important part in making the night just perfect. My date for the night was Ing Tai, here he is:

This is Ing Tai. I don’t really know why I look taller than him in this photo.

There was this super-cool dance, and this super cute (literally, cute, not handsome-cute; cute-cute) guy was dancing on the stage, break-dancing and sort of robot-dancing to a weird mixture of dota (as in the computer game?) movements and the song ‘Petrified’. His timing was SO accurate it was just amazing… impressive… I wish I had recorded it! His dancing showed real talent, and it was so nice to watch. The whole performance was CRAZY-amazing. It was just… just… I’m at a loss for words; it was so great. The ballroom was also very nicely decorated, very pretty, very grand in a simple and classic way.

This is the ballroom. I love the chandeliers. I loved them so much I took pictures of them. Sorry if it’s not too straight. It was difficult ok!?

You may want to wonder how I took this photo. Did I lie on the floor? Did I bend over at 90 degrees?

One day when I’m filthy rich, I’ll buy a chandelier for my living room. Or two, or three.

Enough about the chandeliers. Now back to my evening. It was just wonderful, you know why? Because by some form of miracle, my date was surprisingly SWEET and THOUGHTFUL. I can’t even begin to describe how sweet and thoughtful he was. Aside from fetching me from my doorstep right on time (actually, slightly earlier) and complimenting me, I thought I was dreaming when he gave me this:

Like, how… thoughtful… can you get? A red corsage with a red silk ribbon for my wrist!

And I was shocked to speechlessness when he gave me this:

THREE (not one but THREE, ohmyfreakinggosh) pink-purple roses.

This is a sweet picture of me with my sweet date:

    

Disclaimer: He is not my boyfriend, he is just my DATE. They are not the same thing. Your boyfriend can be your date, but your date is not necessarily your boyfriend.

This is my girlfriend, Grace! Damn, do we look great or do we look GREAT?! Haha, ok, too perasan. But it’s a pretty picture, yeah ;o) Grace, I love you! You’re the best! She’s a wonderful friend, future room mate!

Stop staring at us. We know we’re beautiful.

Let me introduce you guys to Chang. He’s the president of the AUP Society, and a fantastic president at that! Thanks to him, AUP blossomed and grew even larger, with an even larger following and greater popularity at INTI! But we managed to piss each other off during the ball:

Tengah merajuk-ing.

Now, let me introduce you guys to Jonathan. He’s the new president of the AUP Society, and he’s a great friend to everyone! I know he’ll do a great job continuing the legacy of AUP.

 

Picture perfect. Btw. I know that corsages are supposed to go on your hand. But I was so cold that I had to wear Ing Tai’s jacket. Thus I had to remove the corsage from my wrist, so I could get my hand through the jacket hole.

There were some vain-vain-vain photo sessions. This is what remains of the girls of the original Jan 2005 semester. There’s just three of us left at INTI now. By next sem, there will be only two left. And after that, none. Sob.

Mwah! Thank you for coming! Thank you! Thank you! We love you!

I actually contemplated going on a liquid diet for a whole week, just so I’d look good wearing that dress… but… uh, no… it just didn’t work out. Diets and Clairine don’t go hand in hand. Food and Clairine go hand in hand. We’re best buddies, Food and I.

 

I went for first round appetizers, second round main course, and third round desserts. The food wasn’t all that great, but I wanted to make the most of what I paid for, so there :op

Time to make you guys sick with my love of butterflies. I love butterflies, I think they’re extremely lovely creatures. I started loving butterflies since I was a little girl, and I still love them. As decorations or accessories or random works of art, I love them. This was actually all a coincidence. I didn’t mean to have so many butterflies on me that night.

Butterfly heels. My mum bought them for me two months ago, just ‘cuz they were purdy.

Butterfly earrings. A present. I saved them for the occasion.

On loan by my hairdresser-roommate, May Lee. She did my hair (due to my limited budget).

There were lots of lovely greek statues around the whole hotel area and ballroom area. There were too many to take pictures with all of them. So I just took pictures with some of them. The photographer is Ing Tai, I have to give credit to him as I’ve no idea how to use my new camera. And I’m sorry. I couldn’t resist. Here is my vain-vain-vain photo.

Crap. I should have cleared those bags. So zuo deng!

Paint me white and I can be one of those statues!

This is Ferdinand. He manages, successfully, to make his suit look like casual wear. Aww… but I love him anyway :o) He’s like a brother to me.

I’d just like to state that I have totally awesome housemates. I love them both. I didn’t manage to get a shot with May Lee, but I managed to get one with Shantiya, who was at the prom at the DJ’s invitation. She did my makeup for the night, and she was absolutely brilliant with it. I love you, Shantiya!

The one thing I hate about my feet is they’re a size 7. Shantiya has the world’s greatest collection of shoes and her feet are a size 5. Damn, if only……..!

Ing Tai loves his pockets. His hands are always somewhere other than straight by the side.

I feel like a star at some kind of awards show. Lol.

This is Ui San. Cute, funny, and always good to have around.

Nadia and me.

One of the last things I did was take a picture of Ing Tai taking a picture of me.

Towards the end of the ball, I was delirious with happiness and yet felt like crying. The movie that they played was so touching, and just knowing that we would not be seeing each other again for a long long time, since we’re all going to different places, different universities, with different lives ahead of us… The past 1 year and 7 months has been truly and absolutely amazing… There were so many things that we have gone through together, and college will just not be the same without the same people around, the laughter and moments of joy, fun, and happiness that we shared, all the numerous projects and activities we worked on, all the trips, all the lunches, dinners, birthdays, all the long breaks at "Uncle Chong’s Cafe", hanging out at the AUP Office, posing for an insane amount of photographs, the Chinese New Year visiting, the chat sessions at the concourse… every single moment counts and will be remembered and cherished dearly… So, "Til We Meet Again". An interlude soiree with destiny.

 

I’m a happy girl today. Today Clairine is a happy girl :oD

First I went to the Sunway Pyramid Convention Centre for the KL Experiences ‘06 American University Exhibition. I went to the booths for 6 universities. At first I thought that official reps from the universities would be there, and I was (sort of) disappointed to find that actually the booths were completely manned by students of those universities, although there were also some alumni there.

The first booth I went to was University of Wisconsin-Madison. The girl there was a fill-in for someone else who was supposed to be there. She didn’t give me very much information that I was looking for, but she did well enough and was friendly. The next one, the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign… hmm… they didn’t give me such a good impression. The few guys that I spoke to weren’t sure about quite a lot of things. Then I went over to Penn State and Purdue. I didn’t stay long at those two places because maybe… I just wasn’t interested. Then I went to University of Michigan at Ann Arbor’s booth. There, I got the best impression of all. All the student reps looked like they really knew what they were talking about, and they were really friendly and helpful. I also dropped by U Penn’s booth, and spoke to this alumnus, Christine, who looked really intelligent and accomplished (fuhhh) and she was giving me advice on how to apply to this Ivy League school.

After that I went to Wai Keat’s electronics store in Bangsar Village. And I bought a camera!!! A Panasonic Lumix FX01. Woo-hoo! Finally I get my own digital camera!!! I can’t believe it!!! Took some pictures.

This is library book number 1. It’s overdue. I just realized it today.

This is library book number 2. It’s also overdue. I also just realized it today.

These are library books number 1 and 2. I’ve hardly ever read them. And now I have to pay (13 days x RM0.50) RM6.50 in late fines to the INTI College Library. I am making them rich. This is so crappy.

This is a skirt that I bought today. I think that it’s so pretty. I seriously need to move AWAY from ribbons, lace, and etc. because I just can’t STOP myself from buying clothes with them!

This is a picture taken in Form 4. Back when we were all so innocent, hehe.

And finally, this is my new bedspread. Nice leh. Nice lehhh. Nice lehhhhh. So girlie-girl right? Makes you wanna puke right. Hahahahaha. Well I don’t care. I like it. It’s sweet and cheerful and pretty.

Alright then, that’s all for now. I was experimenting with my new camera, hence the (dumb) photos. I’ll take better photos this Friday at the AUP Formal.

I feel like crawling into a hole.

No, a bigger hole. Like a cave.

I just wanna crawl in there. And stay there. And not come out.

OMG. Look at me. I sound like a freaking loser.

I have got to be the most ungrateful person on God’s green earth.

Here I am, presented with a full scholarship complete with perks, to study in the United States, and I feel so miserable because I am torn between two decisions. I have two dreams, and they conflict. This is so F-O-S.

First Dream: To attend a world-class university.
Second Dream: To live and work in the USA after graduation.

By accepting the scholarship, I get to choose among the best universities not only in the States, but in the world. By not accepting it, I’ll be able to fulfil my second dream. I guess in life there are no perfect decisions. Every positive has a negative.

WHY is life so freaking WEIRD?!?!!!

In a moment, everything can change. A few days ago my life was headed for one direction. Now it’s headed for a completely different direction. Just like that. Just. Like. That. Justlikethat!!! *snaps fingers*

Anyway, here’s a poem I’d like to paste here to bore you, and to also describe this pivotal life-altering moment in my life. It’s by Robert Frost and I first read it thousands of years ago in Form 2.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

                  

Today I did something really stupid. Something unbelievably stupid. You can try to guess what the stupid thing I did was. But I’m sure none of us are perfect, and we all tend to make stupid mistakes from time to time. In fact, I’ve done my share of stupid things so far in life. If I can recall some memories, I think that I could make a list of all the stupid things I’ve done in my whole life. Let’s start with the least stupid thing.

10. Drank a mouthful of water while my friend was telling a really funny joke.
9. Bought a pair of expensive heels only to find it being sold at 50% off two weeks later.
8. Overdosed my face with pimple gel and ended up burning the skin off three-quarters of my face.
7. Showing off my amazing Cantonese skills by trying to name all the furniture in my classroom. (I called the table a "teng")
6. Giving myself a haircut, thinking I’d be better at it than professionally-trained hairstylists.
5. Sticking my pen drive, even after knowing that it was infected with a virus, into my laptop. (I honestly don’t know what I was thinking)
4. Stepping on the accelerator instead of the brake when turning out from a corner, upon noticing an oncoming car in the opposite direction. (Yes, I damaged the car, very badly indeed)
3. Proudly running out to buy a surprise birthday cake for my friend, utterly forgetting that she’s allergic to eggs.
2. Using body shower gel to wash my hair and shampoo to wash my body. (Must’ve been drunk, ha..ha..)

And the number 1 stupid thing is…

Well, I did it today. I never truly had an ultimate stupid incident. Most of the incidents were usually just embarrassing, and not too extensive, neither was it too expensive. But today I truly broke all my records in the "Clairine’s Stupid Moments Hall of Fame". The number 1 stupid thing is:

1. Today, I pumped diesel instead of petrol into my mother’s 1 yr old Toyota Altis.

Truth be told, I’ve never pumped petrol in my whole life. I’ve only seen what a petrol station looks like, I know that there’s a hole in the car to put petrol inside, I know that you gotta pay the person behind the window, and … I know that petrol is expensive. That’s all I know. I don’t know how to pump petrol. And for a stupid person like me, I thought diesel is petrol. Well, I guess I’ll remember for the rest of my life that

DIESEL ≠ PETROL

My car actually managed to go 8-10 km, I think, before sputtering and jerking, then finally, dying. However I managed to swerve my dying car to the side of the road to the emergency lane. Frantically, I tried calling my father, and his phone was off. I called my mother, who wasn’t at home, and couldn’t help me because, duh-she-has-no-car, and finally I dug up a service station number from the depths of my car and called it. To my absolute horror, the guy was speaking Cantonese. A shouting form of Cantonese. Cantonese has many forms. It has the soft and very "teh" form. It has the stop-start-stop-start form for those who don’t know how to speak it properly (ahem, like me). It has the fierce and angry form spoken by the Hong Kong Triad gangs like in the movies. And it has the "shouting form" spoken by… the tow truck guy who called me to find out where I was stuck on the highway.

So, anyway. With my amazing Cantonese, I managed to direct the guy way off the place where my car was. So instead of reaching me in half an hour, like he promised, he ended up taking a whole hour, since I gave him such accurate directions. I even locked myself in the car, with no air con, and I couldn’t wind down the windows, cos there were some freaky-lookin guys standing around the side of the road. They knocked on my window pane a few times, asking if everything was ok.

Freaky Guy: *knock knock knock KNOCK KNOCK* Halloh??? Amoi, semua ok ah?
Me: Huh?
Freaky Guy: *knock knock knock KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK* Amoi buka pintu lah. Kereta rosak kah?
Me: Oh! Semua ok! Semua ok!
Freaky Guy: Yakah? Habis kenapa kereta tak jalan?
Me: Semua ok! Semua ok!
Freaky Guy: Lu sure kah semua ok??? Buka pintu lah!
Me: Ya semua ok! Semua ok!
Freaky Guy: *continues staring at me*
Me: :o)

After staring at me for a long time, Freaky Guy left. *sigh* Maybe I am too paranoid and cautious. Oh well. After calling like half a dozen people, finally Eileen sent Edwin to come and "rescue" me. Hahah. After that the story gets really long and boring, so I’ll spare you the details.

So now you must be wondering, why did I title this entry "Stupidity: A Paradox"? Well, while I was waiting at the side of the road for the tow truck to come by, Bank Negara Malaysia called me. I was wondering what on earth BNM wanted to do with me. In fact, at that moment this thought ran through my head:

Maybe they want to give me a certificate to congratulate me for surviving their gruelling, mind-consuming, torturous interview.

I wasn’t prepared for what the lady told me. She told me that I got the full scholarship to go to the United States to study. Quite in shock, I asked her if she had the right person.

So there you have it. Stupidity… A Paradox.