…And Sorry I Could Not Travel Both…

I feel like crawling into a hole.

Hole_1

No, a bigger hole. Like a cave.

Cave

I just wanna crawl in there. And stay there. And not come out.

OMG. Look at me. I sound like a freaking loser.

I have got to be the most ungrateful person on God’s green earth.

Here I am, presented with a full scholarship complete with perks, to study in the United States, and I feel so miserable because I am torn between two decisions. I have two dreams, and they conflict. This is so F-O-S.

First Dream: To attend a world-class university.
Second Dream: To live and work in the USA after graduation.

By accepting the scholarship, I get to choose among the best universities not only in the States, but in the world. By not accepting it, I’ll be able to fulfil my second dream. I guess in life there are no perfect decisions. Every positive has a negative.

WHY is life so freaking WEIRD?!?!!!

In a moment, everything can change. A few days ago my life was headed for one direction. Now it’s headed for a completely different direction. Just like that. Just. Like. That. Justlikethat!!! *snaps fingers*

Anyway, here’s a poem I’d like to paste here to bore you, and to also describe this pivotal life-altering moment in my life. It’s by Robert Frost and I first read it thousands of years ago in Form 2.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;          
 
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,  
 
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.  
 
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

                  

6 Responses to “…And Sorry I Could Not Travel Both…”

  1. Edwin Says:

    just pursue ur 1st dream.. put the burden off your parents.. work for the government for a few years then BLAH off to wherever u wanna go… as simple as that. problem solved

  2. Alex Says:

    quote “I took the one less traveled by,
    And that has made all the difference.”

    Well, be the few who deny the scholarship :) lol, since u already post this poem… Best of luck to you claire :) This is something I dare not advise you. Think hard, choose smart. All I can do is to pray for you. God Bless.

  3. ' - AaRoN - ' Says:

    haha lazy 2 post long long comment… jz wanna tell u 2 follow ur heart wherever it leads… listen 2 ur heart not ur mind… look deep in ur heart there u will find the answer 2 every decision u r makin… Good luck in everything gal… bug me if u need anything kay…

  4. Clairine Says:

    So sweet! Thanks. I appreciate all your care and concern :o)

  5. Jordan Says:

    Well, I hate to say it, but I had to disagree with Edwin about being able to go anywhere after leaving the States. It is very hard to get a job back in the US once you have left US.

    However, my thought on this would be, seek God. None of us here can tell you what is right, or what is wrong. Pray, talk, and consult God in everything you do. You won’t get anything just waiting for God to guide you. God will only help those who seek Him. As it is said in the Bible, knock, and the door will be open. Seek, and you will find.

  6. Alex Says:

    wa..why suddenly there is more than one theologist :P hahaha… GOd become popular in such an evil twist of fate :P

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