Clairine

I was looking forward to going home.

I was really really looking very very much forward to going home this weekend.

Last Sunday I took a lot of pictures of Brownball. I took lots and lots of pictures. I wanted to blog about him, how cute he is, and how I love it when he snuggles against me and licks my hand with his little tongue.

He was the reason why I looked forward to going home so incredibly much.

*****

He’s just a little baby. Just two months old. Look at how small he is compared to this little stuffed doggie.

One thing about Brownball is he loves to lick my fingers. My hands. My toes. It’s not a wet lick, it’s a soft and dry one. His little tongue is so comforting to me whenever I hold him and play with him. Here’s a picture of him licking my fingers. I find it rare to find a bunny who will lick you so willingly and kindly all the time. Whenever I just put my hands near him, he immediately licks me. And it’s such a nice feeling… He’s so extremely special to me because of this quality. He’s the first bunny who’s ever licked me in my life.

He’s the same size as a TY beanie baby bear. Don’t they look cute together. Two angels looking at each other. Two soft, furry, cuddly angels.

Here is Brownball posing for the camera on my study table. He is so smart, he doesn’t use my study table as a toilet. He knows when and where is the right place to go. My study table was absolutely clean even after I let him run around on it for one hour.

I love to let Brownball sit in my lap and I will just pet him and stroke his small little head and body for an hour each day, and maybe more. Sometimes he climbs up on my stomach and just falls asleep there. It’s so adorable watching him sleep. A cute little ball of brown fur.

I even placed him in my bundle of soft toys so that he would enjoy the soft feeling of being around them. He just sat there quietly while I took pictures of him, because I thought it was all just so adorable… and it made such a lovely picture.

I let Brownball look at my Differential Equations homework. He looked quite interested at it. Or maybe it was just my green mechanical pencil. Whatever it was, he hopped around on the sheets of paper for a while.

See? My smart little Brownball looks really interested in my D.E. work. Isn’t that so funny… I brought him upstairs to accompany me studying for my D.E. test. And he really cheered me up that time. I wasn’t so bored with him in my arms and hopping around the pages of math.

He even tried to help me. I suppose. I know I’m being dumb. Bunnies don’t do Differential Equations. Hahah. But my little Brownball just hopped over to my calculator and started playing with the keypad.

Brownball even managed to key in a couple of numbers. What a smart little bunny… Just look at the little guy.

After hopping around here and there and trying to help me with D.E, Brownball went back to the little doggie. And tried to lick it, being so friendly and nice.

And here’s one of the first pictures I took of Brownball when I first brought him and Snowbell home. They look so small. Tiny. They could fit in the palm of my hand.

I looked at these pictures over and over throughout the past week, and waiting and waiting for Friday so I could go home and play with my bunnies. One thing I have to mention here is Snowbell developed a kind of ulcer on her chin, so my mum brought her back to the pet store about 3 weeks ago to change her for another bunny. I never got to name the other bunny.

Once I got home today I immediately ran to the cage that kept Brownball and the other bunny and brought him out and held him - I even spoke to him - "Hi, how are you? Did you miss me? Been eating a lot haven’t you? See you’re getting fat now…" then tickle him and put him down again. He then licked my fingers and snuggled next to my legs… like he was trying to tell me he missed me too.

Then I thought, since they’ve been cooped up in the cage for 1 whole week, I should let them run around…

So I brought them downstairs and out to my front yard… let them run around on the grass. They were really happy. I was really happy. Watching them frolick and play and munch on leaves and scampering about and looking at the flowers and playing with the pebbles and as I sat down and watched them, two little baby bunnies, I felt so happy… I felt like, I should take a picture of this… they both look really so so happy…

Thinking about how much I love Brownball, who licks me fondly and gives me the impression that he really does love me. Thinking about how the two bunnies really love to run and hop and jump and how free and joyful they look. Thinking about how long I had waited for Friday just so I could be with my bunnies. Thinking about how much I missed them and was even planning to bring them to Subang with me, because I didn’t want to leave them alone anymore.

*****

It all happened so fast, like a bold streak of lightning. I can only remember seeing this huge black and white cat literally flying across where I was sitting.

Grabbing hold of Brownball.

By the neck.

I could hear Brownball squealing.

I remember chasing the cat.

But like a streak of lightning, the cat just grabbed Brownball and carried my little baby across the wall to my neighbor’s yard. That was the last I saw of Brownball.

Then I saw the other bunny limping and hopping strangely across my lawn.

She managed to hop to a place near the flowers that she had been sniffing so curiously and happily just moments before. And she lay there, eyes blinking slowly.

I stared at the fence where the cat had disappeared with my Brownball.

I stared at the place where the other bunny was resting, breathing slowly.

Then I saw blood pouring out from the side of her neck. Her body shivering.

Then death.

And that is when I started screaming.

*****

As I write this, I’m still in a state of shock. After what happened, I just stood there, screaming and screaming.

I went upstairs, shaking. Washed my face and sat down and sobbed… and sobbed… and sobbed…

My head hurts.

My heart hurts.

I feel like I can’t breathe.

And I am still crying.

This entry was posted on Friday, September 22nd, 2006 at 1:58 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.