Clairine

So. A week has gone by, just like that. In the blink of an eye, in a flash. But **I** am still on **holiday** until 4th September **yeaaay**. Anyway, a lot of things have happened in the past week. Pluto is no longer a planet. So now we have 8 planets instead of 9. A Russian mathematician has declined the Fields Medal and a million bucks for solving the Pointcare Conjecture.

But this news made me scream in anger and disbelief when I read it this morning. I had actually completed my university application essays about two weeks ago, and one of the essays was about a conflict of science and ethics. I wrote about that topic. And now I have to rewrite it. Because of this latest breakthrough. You have no idea how… how… how… HOW… pissifying this is. @*&^#%*@&$#. %$#@(&@#!!!……. @$*#%!(*&!^@ ?!???!??!???!!!?!!!!!!!!!

Ahem. Yeah. So anyway. My week. Basically since my finals ended on the 9th of August, a Wednesday, I have been rotting at home. Rotting away. Rotrotrot. Every day I would just sleep, eat, online, sleep, eat, toilet, online, sleep etc etc etc. Up until Thursday I decided I couldn’t take it anymore and decided to go out for a movie with my friends. So we went, Shantiya, Surren, Abby, and I… to watch this awesome Hindi film, Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna, which was really really really good. I laughed til my tears came out. Not only once but many times. There’s something for everyone in this movie. The only thing is it’s damn long. 3 1/2 hours I think. But totally worth your money. After that, I went out with May Lee and Shantiya to Secret Recipe. Where guesswhatwedid we camwhored muahahahah. While eating blueberry cheesecake and chocolate indulgence.

Correction: We didn’t camwhore. I camwhored. Huhu ^^

Then when I got home I camwhored some more. Oh you have no idea how much I camwhored. I took 100 photos of myself. In my own defense, I was bored. Okay. People do weird stuff when they’re bored. In my case, I was really bored.


Halllloooouu… it’s me, taking picture #xxx of myself. *coughposercough*

Hi someone please stop me I am so vain omg.

Then I basically wasted away for the next two days, then on Sunday I went to Bukit Tinggi with my family and aunt’s family. While my dad and uncle hit some golf balls and my mum and aunt gossiped, I forced my poor brother to be my photographer. Eh I was bored okayyy. I played newspaper sudoku until I gave up cos the Sunday puzzles are always so evil and impossible to solve without getting a major headache.

Trying to take an artistic romatic photo overlooking artistic romantic scenery but failing horribly.

And and and and and. I went to the Bunny Farm!!! For those of you who know me well, you know I love love love love LOVE L-o-V-E bunnies. Cute lil furry cuddly warm tiny things. *squeals* And they were all so cute. I wanted to kidnap them and bring them back home. Argh. Cuteness personified!

Hi. I’m Clairine. What is your name? You’re very cute lah. But how to carry you huh?

Carry you like this ah?

Or like this?

Ok ok sorry lar. I dunno how to carry you properly.

Dun merajuk. Come I sayang you.

Yeaay finally you decide to pose with me.

*mwah* nah give you a kiss for being such a nice bunny.

Introduing the David Copperfield Bunny. He’s a handsome bunny.

Now you see him…

…Now you don’t!!!

I bet you’re sick of seeing my face so many times on this blog already leh. Well sorry lah. I don’t feel comfortable posting pictures of my relatives/family members in order to sort of protect their privacy. Yup. So. Ok. The ticket for the Bunny Farm is RM3 you can go and check it out if you want to. Btw the journey to Bukit Tinggi is like sitting on a 9 loop roller coaster. Ten times in a row. Just warning you.

On Monday, I went to do something I’ve never done in my whole entire life.

I went to a salon to do my hair! Well, to cut it. And get hair treatment. And I bought a hair serum cos I guess I was hypnotized into doing it by all the salon staff. Altogether it came to about RM200 at Snips in i-zone Sunway Pyramid. The shampooing was so awesome. She massaged my head, my neck even, and put this cooling stuff on my head that made me just feel like… heaven. Whereas Shantiya got red highlights for about RM200 too. And we both walked out of the salon very much broke/bankrupt/pokai/bohlui/muflis but very happy and feeling very pretty indeed hehe.

After that, we both went home and fetched May Lee, then we went to Bangsar for dinner at Mak Koh. Took some pictures but I won’t post them here since you’re sooo sick of looking at my face by now.

On Tuesday I went out to watch Click with Ferdi at KLCC. I felt it was an OK movie, not SO nice but it was entertaining nevertheless. Heard a lot of sniffles in the cinema though. I guess I just have a problem with surreal films. Was really funny though. I like Adam Sandler. I bought two pairs of bling bling earrings, one for me and one for his girlfriend. As a present. Since he’s been so sweet to me.

On Wednesday I went out to watch Mistress of Spices with Wan Qi and Grace, as well as window shop. We had lunch at Chilis (where I introduced them to the cheapest + best food at Chilis) and Auntie Anne’s sour cream and onion pretzels. I thought the movie was OK, not SO nice either, but it’s worth watching if you’re a fan of Aishwarya Rai. She’s so damn beautiful that you can’t take your eyes off her, even if you’re a girl. I could hear the cinema gasping (or maybe it was just those two guys next to me) when she appeared in this breathtaking red saree. Anyway. I got a new pair of heels at bargain price from Vincci! 50% off, strappy sandals, my size, and it was the last pair in the whole store! So lucky. Then we went to FOS (which is one of my favorite stores) to get some baby tees and spag straps. Then to Jusco where I bought this beautiful bling bling hair clip at 50% off. Basically I went home a happy girl. Oh and broke too. Totally broke, this time.

On Thursday (today), I went to see my popo and kungkung in Pahang. And I visited my lil cousins, who were adorable as always. I had a great fun time taking all the toys and placing it high out of reach of them. Huhu. I took a helicopter and made helicopter noises and made it fly all around one lil brother’s head. He was turning round and round trying to catch it. So bad lah me, hor, chi fu little kids, what a bad cousin sister. Then I grabbed another lil brother and placed him on my lap and made him camwhore with me. And later I grabbed yet another lil brother and sat him on my lap in a rotating chair and turned both of us round and round in circles. He was screaming and kicking and yelling but I thought it was so cute so I didn’t let go. I think he had fun cos he didn’t mind me doing it a second time. Aaah. I love little kids. Btw, I have so many cousins I can’t remember their names anymore. Serious. I’ve got 27 cousins on my mum’s side alone.

Yup. So that’s my week.

And now I have to go and handle boring stuff, such as rewriting my uni application essays. @*&#^*@%#.

It’s 3.50 am again. I can’t believe this. I can’t sleep!

I basically spent my whole day watching old DVD’s.

One thing about me is I HATE rewatching movies. I don’t rewatch movies, I just don’t. Unless it’s a really really really good movie and the last time I watched it was, say, 5 years ago… then maybe I’ll rewatch it. For a really really really good movie. Not even just a normal movie.

Today, I watched Stuart Little. Oh gosh, that show, that mouse is really cute, and that little boy, Jonathan Lipnicki, he’s really cute, but the whole thing just doesn’t make sense… it’s so bizarre… if you wanna make a movie bizarre, make the whole thing bizarre… if you wanna make a movie that is real-life, then make the whole thing real-life… don’t mix the two things for heaven’s sake…

I didn’t like the movie.

Then I watched one of Steven Seagal’s ten thousand action movies. I tried to get excited when the bad guys were shooting at each other, I tried to feel sad, when the girl died, I tried to be interested in the whole plot… but… no. I just couldn’t. The whole movie, I can’t even remember the name I disliked it so much and I just watched it just now, was a total… waste of time. My dad likes Steven Seagal. My mum likes Steven Seagal. I don’t like Steven Seagal. He’s not even good-looking. Argh!

Gosh helpmehelpmehelpme. I need sleeping pills this time. My sleeping hours are so irregular. I am not gonna waste my holidays by sitting and rotting away at home! I need to get out. I’m going out. I’m gonna go out tomorrow, dang it!

Let’s see whether I keep my word.

This post has been removed. I should probably do my ranting silently from now on.

*sigh*

This post has been deleted because I wrote it when I was half-conscious at 3.50 in the morning and upon careful and thoughtful consideration, have decided to remove it because it portrays a very irrelevant and unhealthy image.

However, if you want to read it, you can always email me, and I’ll think about it.

A Malaysian dies and goes to hell. There he finds that there is a different hell for each country He goes first to the German hell and asks, "What do they do here?"

He is told, "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the German devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."

The man does not like the sound of that at all, so he moves on. He checks out the USA hell as well as the Russian hell and many more. He discovers that they are all more or less the same as the German hell.

Then he comes to the Malaysian hell and finds that there is a very long line of people waiting to get in. Amazed he asks, "What do they do here?" He is told, "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the Malaysian devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."

"But that is exactly the same as all the other hells, why are there so many people waiting to get in?"

"Because maintenance is so bad that the electric chair does not work, someone has stolen all the nails from the bed, and the devil is a former Government servant, so he comes in, signs the register and then goes to the canteen…"

Dr. Schambaugh, of the University of Oklahoma School of Chemical Engineering, Final Exam question for May of 1997. Dr. Schambaugh is known for asking questions such as, "why do airplanes fly?" on his final exams. His one and only final exam question in May 1997 for his Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer II class was:

Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Support your answer with a proof.

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyles Law (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So, we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that most people and their souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyles Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities.

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. Celine LeBlanc during my Freshman year - that "it will be a cold night in Hell before I sleep with you" - and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then (2) cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic.

The student got the only A.

Disclaimer: This is not a true story.

Today was such a boring day. So unproductive. This was basically my schedule for the whole day:

1. Wake up.
2. Go to church.
3. Eat breakfast.
4. Come back.
5. Read newspaper.
6. Make custard pudding.
   
7. Eat custard pudding.
8. Sleep.
9. Eat lunch.
10. Blog about the extinction of qipao’s.
11. Start a third of my uni application essays.
    
12. Sleep.
13. Eat dinner.
14. Took pictures of my caramel custard pudding.
15. Stared at my uni application essays. Opened and closed the window a few times. Closed it. Forget it. My brain is blocked.
16. Took a long shower.
17. Blog about how bored I am today.

I’M BORED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Holidays suck.

I went for a wedding dinner last night. No, not those grand types in a hotel. Just a small dinner party at a neighbourhood house. And I noticed something that really just hit me. Chinese people don’t wear cheongsams. To be more specific… Chinese ladies don’t wear cheongsams. They just don’t. Malaysians, ask yourselves: When was the last time you saw a Chinese woman wearing a cheongsam? Ok, now ask yourself this: When was the last time you saw a Malay woman wearing a baju kurung? Ah. (Everyday lah this one). And how about an Indian woman? Wearing a saree?

My point: Chinese women don’t wear cheongsams.

My theory is cheongsams are either too expensive, too hard to maintain, or Chinese people simply just think they’re old-fashioned. But these theories have immediate objections. Too expensive? Come on. Chinese ladies can tote around their LV’s and Gucci’s and Prada’s and say that cheongsams are expensive? I don’t think so. What about hard to mantain? Then saree’s…are easy to maintain, is it? Theory #2 strike out. Now, what about old-fashioned? That’s why these outfits are called traditional garments. Key word: traditional.

Ok, so striking out all the 3 theories I introduced just now, I’d like to bring up the final theory that has got me satisfied as to why Chinese ladies don’t wear cheongsams. They’re fat. Yup. In saree’s and baju kurung’s, you can’t really see those layers of flab and fat. But cheongsams, being tight-fitting by nature… you can’t really hide the fact that you’re fat as a cow. Ok. Lousy theory, but it sorta makes sense, no? In cheongsams, you can only truly look good if you are tall and thin with a waif-like figure. No? I don’t know. So basically it’s like a domino effect. Everyone doesn’t wear cheongsams, so no one wears cheongsams anymore.

Baju kebaya’s are lovely. You see ladies wearing them now and then.

Saree’s are equally lovely. Indian ladies wear ‘em all the time, in church/temples.

And… you know what? It’s too difficult to find a lovely picture of a lady wearing a cheongsam. I searched for close to an hour on the web for a nice picture of a full-length cheongsam. Very difficult. I couldn’t get a full-length one. You’ll just have to settle with these pictures:

She wore a super-busty cheongsam (bustier than this) at Cannes 2 years ago. I didn’t like that one.

Errm… not quite what I was looking for.

A bit too traditional.

This is a bit more like it.

Hmm… modernised version. Sex-ified.

Movie still from The 3rd Generation.

Ok… I give up. It’s too difficult to find nice pictures of celebrities in cheongsams. Go watch 2046 and/or The 3rd Generation to know what I mean. Cheongsams are beautiful. Chinese ladies/girls who can wear cheongsams, should wear them more often. It’s part of the culture. You won’t know how good you look in it until you try it!

The more I use friendster blogs the more irritated I get. It has such limited functions! I can’t even post a video from YouTube on this blog. I am so changing hosts, once I make up my mind which to switch to. I really really really can’t stand friendster blogs. Meanwhile, this is the link the video I was talking about: Cinta

Misha Omar & Jaclyn Victor
Malay version

Menapak jalan yang menjauh

Tentukan arah yang ku mahu
Tempatkan aku
Pada satu peristiwa
Yang membuat hati lara
Di dekat engkau, aku tenang
Sendu matamu penuh tanya
Misteri hidup akankah menghilang
dan bahagia di akhir cerita
Cinta… tegurkan hatiku
Tak mahu sesuatu merenggut engkau
Naluri ku berkata
Tak ingin berulang lagi
Kehilangan cinta hati
Bagai raga tak bernyawa
Aku…
junjung petuamu
Cintai dia yang mencintaiku
Hadirnya dulu berlayar
Kini telah menepi
Bukankah hidup kita akhirnya
Harus bahagia…
Di dekat engkau aku tenang
Sendu matamu penuh tanya
Oh misteri hidup
Akankah menghilang
Dan bahagia di akhir cerita
Cinta tegarkan hatiku
Tak mahu
sesuatu merenggut engkau
Naluriku berkata tak ingin berulang lagi
Kehilangan cinta hati
bagai raga tak bernyawa
Aku… junjung petuamu
cintai dia yang mencintaiku
Hadirnya dulu berlayar
kini telah menepi
Bukankah hidup kita akhirnya
harus bahagia
Cinta…
bagaimanapun hidup
ini hanya cerita
Cerita tentang meninggalkan dan yang ditinggalkan
Cinta

Cinta…

Cinta…

English Translated version

As I walk this long path
To the direction that I want                                             
Bring me to the moment that makes my heart reminiscent
I am calm when you are near me                         
Your wistful eyes are full of questions
Will our life mystery be gone
And will happiness be ours in the end?
Love strengthens my heart
Please always be within me
I cannot afford to lose you again
It is like a body without a soul
I still remember all your advice
I love the one who loves me
This journey has reached the end
Shouldn’t we be happy?
I am calm when you are near me                         
Your wistful eyes are full of questions
Will our life mystery be gone
And will happiness be ours in the end?
Love strengthens my heart
Please always be within me
I cannot afford to lose you again
It is like a body without a soul
I still remember all your advice
I love the one who loves me
The journey has reached the end
Shouldn’t we be happy?
Whatever life is, it is still just a story
A story about those who leave and those who stay
Love…

What a long week! Final exams are over, YEAH!!! Typical me with my last minute studying, my burning-the-midnight-oil-kau-kau, experimental-self-torture, never-sleep-never-eat-never-move-justsitthere studying. And I paid my price! Business Law is the toughest subject ever. I am not kidding. It’s harder than HIS251+HIS252. It’s harder than CALI+CALII+CALIII. It’s harder than all five subjects put together. To those of you who are planning on becoming a lawyer, I totally respect you man. And to those of you who are gonna take LAW301 next sem, G-O-O-D L-U-C-K.

When I opened the final exam paper for LAW301 I saw this question staring back at me:

"Explain the tort of deceit." (5 marks)

I was like, oh my goodness. I totally cannot remember. I totally don’t know what that is. I totally forgot. What is it?? What is it??? WHAT IS IT????? whatisitwhatisitwhatisitwhatisitwhatisitwhatisitwhatisitwhatisit!!!???!!!*&%#$#^

Finally, I wrote this. 5 mark question, mind you.

"The tort of deceit is a type of tort."

…………………mffffmmmgghhmmm.

Ok. So basically, I screwed up my law. Other subjects were relatively ok, but I don’t wanna think about it anymore. Moving on. While I was studying I couldn’t take the boredom so I started snapping pictures. This is what I was staring at for, what, 8 to 9 hours straight? While my room mates were comfortably sleeping on the other side of the curtain?

Felt like the twilight zone.

Cheap + entertaining wallpaper.

I posted a lot of pictures on my wall, so that I can be entertained while I study. The calendar on top of the socket is my weekly planner. Cos I am the most forgetful person on earth and I can’t keep track of all my activities in my head. The poster on top is a poem ("…life’s battles don’t always go to the faster or stronger man, but the man who wins is the man who thinks he CAN!"… ok I know, ‘no comment’ right? aiyah, it’s a motivational poster, I just put it there for fun). In the center are winnie-the-pooh stickers. Yeah I know. (omg, she’s so childish!). Well, I like em. I think they’re cute. And they’re very entertaining.

Ok. Moving on. I had lunch in the market last Wednesday, and was so bored I took pictures of a kitten. It says a lot about how bored one is, when one starts photographing stray kittens in the market.

Eh, the kitten was cute ok?

Then I went back to college to hang out in the AUP Office, which is the best place to hang out in the entire INTI College Subang Jaya campus. Jason introduced me to his football. I liked his football. I liked it so much + I was so totally bored = Camwhoring.

I love this ball man!

Then Jason joined in the camwhoring. The football isn’t actually a football, it’s a… football pillow. Stuffed with I guess, styrofoam beads or something. Haha. Looks like I’m balancing a real ball on my head.

Jason the Poser. Muahahahahah. Pity the ball.

Oh yeah, on Monday we had the American History trial. Peacekeepers v. George Bush et al. We were on the defendant’s side, sayng that it was the right thing to do, to go into Iraq. And we won!!! We had Wern How as the superb and killer lawyer, Chong Yih as Dick Cheney, Julian as Colin Powell, and David as Tony Blair. How cool is that? I was the female political analyst lah by the way. Didn’t know half of what I was crapping up there on the witness stand.

They posed for me. Heheh. Cheney and Powell shaking hands. In ICSJ.

Fuhhh. Gaya man. They all look so smart and cool. Dun play.

Whereas, on Saturday, I went to Victoria Station for a farewell dinner party with my 20 of my college mates, some of whom are going to the USA this month. This was two days before my Business Law final exam. No wonder I couldn’t answer the tort-of-deceit-question. I was too busy enjoying myself to study. Haha. No la. I studied after I got home. I drank two shots of coffee (poison!!! ick ick ick ickkkk) and forced myself to study and didn’t sleep until 6 in the morning.

Lobster brisque soup for starters. Totally not worth it. Small, expensive, and tasteless.

Flame-Grilled Charbroiled Steak Au-Cognac something like thatla the name was too long to remember and hard to pronounce. Shared this with Mei Qin.

The Great Train Climbers. Ok I know we’re not fooling anyone.

Posers. Posing. Again. Mei Qin, Miss Angela, and me.

I didn’t purposely take it sideways. Miss Angela took it for me sideways.

We managed to piss each other off again. Battle of Chang and Clairine II.

At the end of a longlonglonglonglong week, of 6am to midnight studying, of being the only one awake when the whole house sleeps, and of regretting (yet again) that I hadn’t studied earlier, consistently, and thoroughly; I fell sick. I am still sick lah. Flu, cough, runny nose, sore throat, the works. Can you believe this? I can’t even enjoy my holidays now. Cos I am SO SICK. Why does this always happen to me??? Now, I gotta find that Hardworking Pill and swallow a whole lot of it.

Please, someone invent one. I need it.